Do I really need to go to counseling for that?


You’ve probably asked yourself, “Do I really need to go to counseling? It’s not like I’m crazy or anything.”

So I’m here to answer your question – Do I really need to go to counseling?

The answer is yes.

Okay, fine. I’m a counselor myself so I’m a little bias. But let me tell you why the answer is yes and I’m SO passionate about what I do.

Because of Freedom.

I don’t quite know why but it’s the most underrated thing in this life. I’ve found, though, that when the fear of the unknown is greater than the fear of the known, we stay in bondage. And that is the number 1 thing that stops people from experiencing freedom - fear.

Be honest with yourself, what you’re doing IS working for you – or you wouldn’t do it. It may seem like you hate experiencing your particular struggle but at least it’s familiar. And honestly, you may not remember a time you lived without it so maybe you’re not quite sure how to.

Here are a few things I have found to be true –

Freedom is attainable. 

The road to freedom will be difficult. There’s no doubt about that. But let’s be honest – what would be more difficult is to continue to live the way you’re living now.

Feelings are liars. 

It may FEEL like you’ll never be able to live in freedom. That you can never live without the shame of what you’ve done. Or never get past what’s been done to you. But praise the Lord – the truth, the REAL truth, of who you are isn’t rooted in how you feel.

When we understand how we got to be the way we are, we’re in the best position to make desired change. 

This is my passion. Helping people understand how they got to be where they are today. I live by this truth – what you are experiencing today is a repeat of the past. Which leads me to my next point…

For us to be stable, the brain has to be resistant to change.

Growth is hard. And it takes time! If we were to be able to change instantly we would lose our ability to function. God gave us the ability to build patterns, consistency, and routines for a reason. Really, who would we be if we were constantly changing from day to day?

Ignoring your past doesn’t make it go away. 

Last but not least, my favorite. I hear this all too often. To be unaffected by our past is truly impossible.
We weren’t meant to forget things. Which relates back to my last point. If we forgot, then not only would we forget the good – but we would be unable to live daily lives. I would have to relearn basic life skills daily if that were the case.
The cognitive abilities of a child to intake information is so concrete that is it impossible to separate our experiences and the messages we receive as separate from ourselves.
When receiving these messages as children, we often internalize them as beliefs about self. Through those beliefs, we live our lives as adults. There’s no way around that. Which is why it’s so important to not fall for the lie that you’re unaffected by your past.